As you're swimming through the dating pool, you’re going
to come across plenty of men who are divorced. Maybe you are even divorced
Divorced men can be great to date.
They may have a lot going for them:
- They understand what it’s like to go though a divorce
- They’ve proven they can make a commitment (sort of)
- They know how to be a life partner, and
- Hopefully, they’ve learned a few lessons from their divorce about
how to make a woman happy!
But like everything, there can be downsides to dating a man following
his divorce- especially if he starts dating too
To help avoid broken hearts, it’s helpful to know the signs
that a man is ready to date after his divorce.
Although these signs won’t fit for every man in every circumstance,
they are a good general guideline. Plus, you can use them to determine
if YOU are ready to date after your own break up.
5 Signs a Divorced Man is Emotionally Ready
1. The Ink has Dried on His Legal Divorce
Almost always, it’s a bad idea to date a man who is only separated,
or whose divorce is still in the works. In these cases, the situation
is just too fresh for him to make a great partner for someone else. If
he’s really that perfect of a match for you, he’ll still be
available when the ink dries.
2. The Divorce has been Official for at
Least 6 Months
It takes time to grieve and heal after the end of a marriage. It can’t
be rushed. It will likely take more than 6 months for a guy to be ready
for serious dating. In fact, it often takes 1-2 years to properly process
a divorce on an emotional level and truly be present enough to start another
3. His Mood is Stable
As you know, along with a divorce comes lots of negative feelings to deal
with and just when you think you’re done, it starts up again. This
emotional roller coaster is no fun to be on, never mind be dating someone
who is still on it! So beware if he seems needy or clingy. Ditto if he
often gets distant or withdrawn. All are signs that he’s got more
healing to do and isn’t yet ready for real romance.
4. Only a Few Mentions of the Ex
Does his ex come up in conversation a lot? Or does he still use “we”
when referring to her? Or worse, does he lean on you for support about
his relationship with his ex? Nothing is a more sure sign that someone
is not ready to date than these signals that she’s still not far
from his mind.
5. Infrequent Contact with the Ex
Hey, it’s ok to stay friendly with your ex if that works for both
of you. But beware if he still sees or talks to her frequently. More than
occasional contact with an ex is a clear sign that part of him is still
wrapped up in their connection. As you remodel your sense of identify
from duo to solo and build new support systems, the ex’s importance
should gradually recede into the background. If she’s still in the
foreground- there’s no room for you!
With these signs in mind, you’ll be prepared to determine
if a divorced guy is really ready for love.
When in doubt, go slowly and give your new bond a chance to blossom over
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